inner thoughts

Sometimes you have to call a "guy fast" to reprioritize and decide what you want out of life and what sort of guy will add to your life, not distract and make you lose sight of yourself. Go out there with a heart full of hope, not with your mind already bracing for the next painful breakup.

Wishing you success in knowing what you want out of life and the tenacity to go after it.

Cheers-
CK

"getting hurts" is an understatement in my situation by the way but here's something I'm learning. Like you, I'd love to have a guy in my life. I'm sure life would be better having someone love you and you love them back. Like someone cares about you, makes you feel alive, puts a smile on your lips, makes your heart skip a beat, makes you feel like life worth living

That's all nice and dandy but chances are you could have that amazing guy but you wont be happy because you'll realize you'll have to live through turmoil for one reason or the other. How many couples do you know who are happy?

You'll always live in agony, stress- is he looking at someone else? Is he cheating on me? Is he getting sick of me? Will he fall out of love with me? Will he leave me? Can I really be completely naked emotionally with him? And so on

The ONLY way to be with someone and feel COMPLETE is if you complete YOURSELF. There are no guarantees in life. Chances are a guy WILL cheat on you, WILL leave you, WILL hurt you.

You have to fight for yourself and yourself ONLY. You have to ABSOLUTELY happy and content and absolutely OKAY without any #@$#@$# guy in your life.

Then when Mr. Right comes into your life. You both will have a healthy relationship and you'll be happy because he wont be the source of your happiness... YOUR TOGETHERNESS is the source of your happiness NOT HIM.

Deep down no guy wants to be the complete source of happiness to someone else. It might feel cool at first but later it will be a chain around his neck..

So don't be anyone's chain- be your own happiness. Cry... if you want... I cry 50 times a day... I cry when I wake up, I cry before I go to sleep, I cry in the toilet, I cry in the shower, I cry in the car... It's my new hobby but at the end, I try with EVERY SINGLE FRIGGIN DROP OF ENERGY in my system to pick myself up and move on.

It hurts to be alone...but I'm proud of who I am and I'm proud that I made it this far with no one by my side... I went through hell in life and I made it on my own... One day when I find and meet my guy... I'll be more than happy to share my life with him because I want to "share" it and not give it all away... just as I don't expect him to throw away his life at me...but share his.

hope that helps...